John HenryJohn Henry
Jay Ward pastiche/update
By Doug Holverson
PAGE#1, PANEL#1: (Title panel, all caption in scrolly mock decorative type.)
Truncated Tall Tales:
"John Henry Gets Spiked"
"The Hammer & Fickle"
PANEL#2: (John Henry shows up for work in front of the building for the H&O Railroad. Standing there is Shorty, a diminutive white trashy fellow with an engineer's cap and overalls and a straw dangling from under his bushy mustache).
Shorty How's things, John Henry?
John Henry I'm rarin' to beat my personal best rail spike poundin' record!
PANEL#3: (John is taken aback by bad news from Shorty.)
Shorty Ya cain't, all ya steel drivin' men have done been laid off 'n' replaced by a gismo called the Inky Poo!
PANEL#4: (John strikes an assertive pose while Shorty just stands there.)
John This can't be! I'll going to the complaint department!
Shorty Ya cain't! They's been replaced by voice mail…
PANEL#5: (John strikes an assertive pose while Shorty just stands there.)
John Then, I'm seei