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the car that cried alarmThe Car that Cried Alarm
A Jay Ward and Bill Scott pastiche by Doug Holverson
PANEL#1 PAGE#1: (Title Card.)
Title Trunciate Tall Tales
"The Card that Cried Alarm"
PANEL#2: (A Motorist dressed like a fifties sports car enthusist.)
Caption Once upon a time there was a Motorist.
PANEL#3: (A motor falls out of the sky and lands in the outstretched hand of the Motorist.)
Caption And what's a motorist without a motor?
Motorist Yeah! Without it I'd be just an ist! (different bubble) Or worse yet, just a lowly pedestrian!
PANEL#4: (The Motorist tosses the motor over his shoulder, bounces it with his heel, where it lands in the motor compart
Dumpy Little PrincessTHE DUMPY LITTLE PRINCESS
Jay Ward and Bill Scott pastiche by Doug Holverson
PAGE#1, PANEL#1: (Title card.)
Title Truncated Tall Tales
The Dumpy Little Princess
PANEL#2: (The Dumpy Little Princess doing a little courtesy.)
Caption Once upon a time there was a princess.
PANEL#3: (The Dumpy Little Princess with her arms akimbo looking annoyed.)
Caption No ordinary princess she, for she was a Dumpy Little Princess.
Dumpy Little Princess Hey, narrator-boy! You ain't no Cary Grant yourself!
PANEL#4: (A sad Dumpy Little Princess pulls her patched pockets inside out as a moth or two escapes.)
Caption Fate was even harsher on our princess,
John HenryJohn Henry
Jay Ward pastiche/update
By Doug Holverson
PAGE#1, PANEL#1: (Title panel, all caption in scrolly mock decorative type.)
Truncated Tall Tales:
"John Henry Gets Spiked"
"The Hammer & Fickle"
PANEL#2: (John Henry shows up for work in front of the building for the H&O Railroad. Standing there is Shorty, a diminutive white trashy fellow with an engineer's cap and overalls and a straw dangling from under his bushy mustache).
Shorty How's things, John Henry?
John Henry I'm rarin' to beat my personal best rail spike poundin' record!
PANEL#3: (John is taken aback by bad news from Shorty.)
Shorty Ya cain't, all ya steel driv
27He had 27 bones
in his left hand, all under a thick netting
of coral reef. He had 27 bones in his right hand too, each perfectly preserved.
Both hands held their breath
as he approached stage exit.
Hit every bar, tour every state.
A river runs interstate through Texas.
Small yellow lines jump straight through it.
Take the US-27 from Fort Wayne to Miami. A second doesn’t make it
to his destination.
Cobalt. Aluminum. A third was found dead, drowned in his pool,
an empty shot glass floating beside him.
Cobalt weighed down his shoulders. Alumi
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`ChewedKandi has certainly gone out of her way to keep the vector community on the right path. Always making sure that her talents are infinitely scalable, Sharon has put her bezier curves to excellent use, and firmly anchored herself as an inspirational leader. We're absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for June 2013 to `ChewedKandi. Congratulations, Sharon! Read More